Red’s First Steps: Page 10
Henry surely knows how to overwork his employees with all these requests. Not like any of them would dare to question him about it…
Henry surely knows how to overwork his employees with all these requests. Not like any of them would dare to question him about it…
Red needs to work on those sneak/spy skills and maybe her balance too.
Red hasn’t had time to adjust to her new body. Obviously, the center of gravity has changed, and I suspect her legs are longer than before, either proportionally to her height, or in the absolute sense. And I kind of doubt any boy hanging out with Melvin and BJ would have been particularly well-balanced before the transformation.
At this point in time, Tiffany has been transformation into a girl for maybe a year or so. That should be more than enough time to adjust to the new center of gravity that Red has had to deal with after becoming a girl. I think that Red being overly curious as to what Henry saying on the phone about Gramps, Thomas Clark and other things that relate to the subject of Red being turned into a girl, that Red lost track of what she was doing and pressing up against the door to hear better and turning the door nob and we have this situation of her coming through the door. I credit this situation to not paying attention to what she was doing, than to being clumsy or off balance because, of the change in center of gravity.
I think that your over thinking this thing.
@Larry “At this point in time, Tiffany has been transformation into a girl for maybe a year or so.”
That would be the case for the current events in the main story. But this little storyline “Red’s First Steps”, takes place just a few weeks after she meet Jeanie and was turned into a girl. This moment in particular, being the morning of her first day at Southeil, her new school for girls.
Henry: *to someone on his phone* I’m going to have to call you back, I want to have a little dialogue with my child.
Panel 5: and if i do, don’t let anyone FIND my body!
That single piece of line has a long history of me fixing a typo, to then me making a new one, fixing the new one, just to somehow bring back the previous on… hopefully I didn’t break anything this time. It’s fixed now, thaks!
You know what’s interesting the fact that the original webcomic this span off from the genie one has a wiki page on the badwebcomics wiki yet this one doesn’t don’t get me wrong I do like this webcomic it has a nice charm and the art and I wanna say world building is better than the genie one. Really my only issue is it’s some times hard to follow like all that stuff with Kazom faffing around in dream land. The point is I like this webcomic and it just surprised that the genie one got enough hate for people to document it yet for some reason despite how the internet can be they left Melvin and co alone. Let’s hope it stays that way
Oh, about that entry in BWW? Suffice to say it’s speaks ill of some friends of mine so I am not specially fond of it, but still, funny history. Digging about the MC myself, before taking over it, I actually fond a forum post made by the author of that entry on JB. He had plans to make another entry based on the MC and CD’s Rudd other comic at the time (SS.org), but seemingly never commit to it. I am not specially interested to ask him what, if anything made him change his mind, as far as I know he probably lost interest or lacked time. I am open to criticism, so if he ever has something to say about the MC in general, and my current run in specific, I am willing to listen, but still, I can’t say I care that much of whatever opinion this individual may have as of now.
Speaking of being open to criticism, yeah, I admit to have lost the plot a couple of times (being generous) during the whole Dream part. The plan was to use that chapter to introduce characters, fill in some backstory, and set up the future plot lines, but I admit, I drag it for far to long, though being my first time writing, I am fully aware it was because I couldn’t find an out from it in time, or the right pacing to begin with. I hope to improve over time, but any feedback and constructive criticism is always welcome.
In any case, glad you seem to like the comic so far!
These comics, people either like them or they don’t and if they don’t like them, they have a tendency to be vocal about it. I personally like Jeanie Bottle and it well put together too. But, this is CD Rudd third web comic, so he has had plenty of practice with it. But, this is Carlos first web comic effort. When Carlos took over the Melvin Chronicles, he was like seven to eight months or so behind the Jeanie time line in the Jeanie Bottle series. Then he wanted to catch Melvin Chronicles up to where Jeanie Bottle was in the time line, then add other characters to the Melvin Chronicles and now he doing the back stories on them. So thing did kind of get messed up a bit.
It a bit late to do it this way now, but, I would have taken my time to catch up with the Jeanie Bottle series because I would probably get all mess like this. I would have taken the next three to six months to catch up to the same time that Jeanie bottle was in. I would have done a closer of thing that were currently going on or chosen to clean up the mess that was left behind by the previous author of the Melvin Chronicles before going on to something new.
I would have put this part of Melvin Chronicles of Red that your doing right now with the rescue Clamor that is still under lock and keys right now. I would have spent the first two or three month taking care of this. This would have been within the first two month after Red became a girl. I would have had this started at the beginning of of the 9th grade school year. I would have stuffed the rescue of Clamor and stuff that your telling us about Red into that two to three month period. I would had the women that they left on the street get pissed off at being left behind and looking for Melvin and crew and they decide to rescue her and BJ step in and want to be the great rescuer of Clamor, because, he has a thing with her. They rescue her and they snatch two of those motorcycle from the molter pool, she take one and BJ grabs the other one and Clamor. Then we have the chase seine and BJ stuff the into the dumpster to hide the motorcycle and take Clamor into a hotel room where they are hiding from those other guys. We see them going into a hotel room and that all we see, it only later on that we find out that she heat, BJ knocked her up, but, we don’t find out until later. Clamor on the run from those witches, because, she did something she wasn’t suppose to do and get stuck in a time loop and come back sixteen years later with cat girl daughter that look exactly like BJ in the face, but, has long hair with cat girl ears and a tail and the same glasses too. She want to meet her dad BJ. While this is going on, you would also be doing Red back story about the same time that it was suppose to happen also. That would deal with most of the eight to nine months that your behind, with a few things for Melvin and BJ would be close to the end of ninth grade. Then do the other of bringing those other character into the story in the summertime and maybe follow Red around a little bit too. Now there in 10th grade and JJ has graduated for sixth grade and she now in seventh grade. It would have been a whole lot cleaner and easier to follow and then do a card deck shuffle and your off and running.
Well, still like the series and some time is is hard to follow, but, it still good.
Like Larry said the webcomic has it’s flaws but in the end we read it because we like it. You should be proud of yourself that you’ve taken over the webcomic and people like your stuff you might not have the experience but practice makes perfect and I think you’ve improved since taking over also any creator/writer that can take criticism and acknowledge the flaws in their creation is definitely deserving of some respect. As an aspiring creator myself I can relate to some of your challenges. Like you can write and pretty decently in my opinion I can’t write for shit so yeah we like it and your getting better at telling the story so the scenario benefits everyone
@ Corlys, I would kind of like to develop a series of my own too but, I would have to get a way to make my own comic character like CD Rudd and Carlos do. I don’t know what would be the best software to buy to practice with to make those cartoons character with. But, as to idea’s, I have plenty of those. Those idea’s come pretty easy to me. I come up with an idea for the main character and then I develop that character in my head as to who they are and what happens to them.
The trolls at BWW are the sort of cowards Teddy Roosevelt excoriated in his famous “It’s not the critics that count” essay. None of them will ever have the guts to create or publish anything and they know it so they project their self-loathing on others while hiding behind the anonymity of the internet. They also seem utterly blind to irony of using grammar subliterate enough to embarrass a third grader to criticize others.
So Red doesn’t like the pink striped panties.
Quick, someone get her the black lacey ones 🙂